Tender breath for tender spaces
I went home to the river yesterday. Physical homes may come and go, the Battenkill River will always feel like home to me. I got to share stories of my family, the history of the area, and so many meaningful places with my wide eyed travel buddies. It felt bittersweet.
On my winding path back to Troy lit by the last bits of twilight my heart ached heavy for what once was. The pain of feeling relationships slip away. Walking the tightrope of bittersweet between a vast array of cherished memories and a knowing that spending less time with family was a choice I made to protect my peace.
My body feels the borage of big emotions that have come up for me this week. Iām taking time to feel them all and being curious about how my body becomes the cauldron to take it all in and let it all go, transform it to whatever my heart desires.
So today I start my day with The Heart Breath from Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas. Iām writing this before my practice with an open (and aching) heart and curiosity about how it could shift this weight I feel.
Update post-heart breath
This breath made me feel like I was floating on water, I could feel the soft undulations below me as the heart breath motioned in and out. It was comforting to put my hand on my heart to press on the heaviness like I was distributing it outward. It started to make me feel dizzy sitting upright so I stretched out on the carpet.
The breath feeling like it was stretching me up and down. To accentuate that stretching feeling I moved over to the wall and the bare wood floor. It felt good to have my legs up on the wall and my arms stretched above me. A full body stretch to pull my energy out from the center. I do feel lighter. The heaviness shrunk from the size of a peach down to a cherry. š A speck of grief taking its time to work its way out.
